Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Mommy Mortification Badge, Check!

When a new Mom takes her beautiful newborn home, I doubt she ever thinks about the shock and embarrassment that little bundle of joy will bring down on her someday. Oh, yeah... there will be mommy mortification moments in their future. I am not just talking about spit up on the shoulder, or stray bits of food on a mom's hair. I am talking about the big stuff... stuff that involves complete strangers. This is little man before we left the hospital. I was in awe of his size, and completely unaware of the embarrassment he would soon bring down on me.

But thank goodness that isn't a thought in those first couple of days. We take the precious little baby home, and love them, raise them, and then they become toddlers...

And as toddlers they have an amazing command of language, but no sense of boundaries. Which leads me to the reason for my recent mommy mortification moment.

Yesterday our upstairs toilet was plugged. Unfortunately, our plungers have both been chewed to bits by our new puppy... has anyone else thought their bulb plunger resembled a Kong dog toy? I know that is beyond gross, but it left us plunger-less. So we all hopped into the car and headed down to get a replacement. My little Chatty Kathy of a son was busy telling folks in line everything about his life! He was downloading about his Christmas tree, toys and the day's activities. When we go up to the checker, as we were loading our bucket and plunger onto the counter, my son turned to her and said, "My mommy poops a lot. She broke our toilet."


I am sure that I turned a deep shade of red. I really couldn't stop laughing... or crying. Of course my husband couldn't contain his laughter either. Bless that woman working the check-out counter!  She didn't miss a beat. She was a mom herself, and assured me her children had said some awful things before, too. She offered to share, but said the last incident had been rather dirty. Honestly, getting another Mom was all that kept me from sinking through the floor at that moment. I know, I deal with dirty diapers, and cleaning up poop all day.. but, I would rather our bathroom exploits remain private!

As mothers, we have all been through it. Little ears and minds hear all sorts of things in our homes, but they sometimes over share in public. I am sure it is not my last embarrassing moment with my kids. My daughter will be talking up a storm soon enough. But, yesterday I feel like I earned my badge. I am truly a mother and my kids say the darndest things!
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